Tim's personal story
My wife belted me and the kids on several occasions during our marriage and even chased me out of the house with a knife threatening to kill me. I have never laid one finger on her or the kids ever.
She is an alcoholic and the kids were often exposed to her bad behaviour. We lived under the same room but in separate bedrooms for 3 years. I then found out that she had been on the adult sex website adultmatchmaker after she failed to log out of the family computer.
I discovered that for over a year, she had been going down to the local car park by the beach in Bayside, Melbourne at night (when she told me she was going out for her hour walk each night) and had been having unprotected sex with several dozen strangers in their cars - with men she had met online and going to swinger events and have orgies and unprotected sex with large groups of swingers in Bayside.
When I confronted her about it, she called the police, took the kids from me and got an intervention order against me, because she claimed she felt I 'might' become violent. And that's all the police care about. As a man, you might and could have the potential to be violent. Therefore, under this current legislation, EVERY man is guilty already as we all have 'potential' to become violent.
I told the police she has hit me and she even agreed she had and that I'd never hit her. The police said, the system isn't fair mate, but your in a lot of trouble because your wife says she fears "you might" become violent after finding out about her private life and that's the law and how I breached her privacy by looking at her online sex activities with other men. I'm now facing charges and a criminal record for reading her history on the family computer, that I bought and paid the internet access for!
I have spent every cent on legal fees and been in the court system for 10 months now. I even have a court appointed family report saying that the kids should live with the father and even in the short term, the kids should not remain with the mother.
The judge said: "well, I don't really like moving kids from where they are! We'll leave all children matters or the final trial in 6 months time."
They should never have been taken in the first place, but I had no choice, no say and the police did nothing when she took them from me. It seems as a dad I have no rights at all, I am completely shafted by the courts and legal system. Nobody cares about dads. Women can behave badly, and do whatever they like and the court or police do nothing.
I have already been told, despite the court reporter clearly recommending that the kids live with me and that this is the kids wishes too, that it is extremely unlikely any judge in Victoria will change the current living arrangements, and in fact because there is no agreement, there is even a high chance that the time I already get will be reduced further in final orders.
COMPLETE and UTTER madness, injustice and unfair.
Men have little or no rights in Australia in the family court.
The sad part about the whole thing, the kids are not better off with her and should be with me (as even the court reporter noted). The court is not acting in the best interests of the children.
Women want equal pay, equality in the workplace etc but family law is far more unjust towards men than any of these issues.