Paul's personal story
Sunday, July 16, 2017
One in Three Campaign

My experience is not unlike so many others on here. For 8 years I was physically, emotionally and financially abused by my ex-partner. She was a police officer and this made it impossible to get anything done about her abuse. Even making a complaint to the local command resulted in being told by an inspector to call 000 if it happened again as reporting it would result in her dismissal. Another member of the local Family Violence Unit even stated that no copper would believe me as she was 5'2" and I was 6' so how could she possibly be able to assault me.

Eventually we separated after I found her having an affair with a work colleague. She then went to her work station and had a IVO taken out against me as she was “in fear” that I would do something. No evidence whatsoever. Her best friend at the station took out the order and I was not even consulted nor had the opportunity to voice my side of the story. Fortunately I had a investment property to reside at and was actually glad it was all over (I thought) and I could move on. I was then banned from my own house for 18 months until settlement was finally completed.

After settlement I went to the house only for her and her partner to turn up and abuse me. The male walked straight into the house and king hit me while I was sitting down and then had the crap kicked out of me by my ex while the male held me down in a choker hold. I passed out several times and was so relieved when the police, who I had called finally arrived. Unfortunately they were from their police station so believed them when they stated that I was the offender and breaching the IVO and I was handcuffed and arrested. Fortunately I had paper work to prove I was the owner and they were the trespassers so was released and they were arrested and charged.

An internal investigation has since discovered some of the other activities she was up to and lies she had told and was forced to resign 3 days before pleading guilty to charges in the magistrates court. The story has so much more involved. I have been arrested 7 times and held in custody for 21 hours for allegedly breaching the IVO but always exonerated. Her abuse of the family violence order continues as she knows she will never be prosecuted for making false allegations. Have even had police officers admit they know there has been no offence committed but have to follow “procedures”.

I supplied the police with photographic evidence of some of the assaults that occurred on me over the years but she was never prosecuted. Imagine the actions taken if a female was bashed over the head with a piece of floor board and knocked unconscious and left with injuries all down her face. After the assault on me the police Professional Standards Command applied for a IVO against them on my behalf and 15 months later no IVO has been granted by the magistrate, fortunately an interim order was put in place. I totally believe women need a great deal of protection from violent men and should have all the assistance they can get to be made feel safe. But there must be greater checks and balances in the process to avoid the exploitation of the domestic violence act by vengeful females.

Article originally appeared on One in Three Campaign (
See website for complete article licensing information.