SERVICES AND RESOURCES
Unfortunately there aren't many tailored services and resources available for male victims of family violence and abuse. This page provides a list of known services in Australia and internationally, along with a selection of generic services that might also be able to help you. We have also provided links to a selection of online resources that might be useful for male victims to read.
Please be aware that some general services might at best be unaware of the unique issues faced by male victims of family violence and at worst might even blame, shame, ridicule, minimise, disbelieve or misunderstand you. If this happens, please try another service. Don't give up!
ONE IN THREE CAMPAIGN RESOURCES
The One in Three Campaign has produced a series of high-quality posters as A4, A3 and A2 sized PDF documents, ready to print off and display at workplaces, in waiting rooms, health clinics and other areas where support for male victims of family violence and abuse is needed.
Police - In an emergency, call 000 (or 112 from a mobile phone). The police have the power and responsibility to intervene to protect you from physical or sexual violence or stalking.
Lifeline (NSW) - A crisis support and suicide prevention helpline for all people. There is no guarantee they will be able to respond appropriately to men experiencing family violence and abuse, but they might still be very useful. Lifeline provides access to 24-hour telephone counselling on one national number. Call 131 114 for the cost of a local call or go to their website at www.lifeline.org.au. Other resources can be found at www.lifeline.org.au/find_help.
Victims’ Support Line (NSW) - A generic help line for all victims of physical or sexual assault. Call the 24-hour Victims’ Support Line for information, practical support and referrals. The staff can tell you about your right to claim compensation and help you complete an application, as well as provide you with information about preparing a victim impact statement. Call (02) 8688 5400 (Sydney metro) or 1800 633 063 (free call), or check out the website at http://www.lawlink.nsw.gov.au/vs.
Support groups - The One in Three Campaign is seeking expressions of interest from male victims of family violence and abuse who would like to attend a support group. If you are interested, please click here to contact us. We will be in touch once we have received sufficient interest to start a group in your area.
Mensline Australia - A generic helpline for all men and all relationship issues, not specifically family violence. For instant, confidential, professional, male-friendly counselling, call 1300 789 978 for the cost of a local call, 24/7, or go to their website at www.menslineaus.org.au. Mensline also offer a Call-Back Counsellor service, who can work with you on bigger issues than their crisis line or until you access another useful service. Unfortunately there are very few services available for them to refer male victims on to. They have put together a good tip sheet for male victims of domestic violence, available at www.mensline.org.au/Are-you-experiencing-violence-or-abuse-in-your-relationship.html.
Dads in Distress - A dedicated support group of men whose immediate concern is to stem the present trend of male suicide due to the trauma of divorce or separation. This is not a family violence service, but might still be helpful to male victims where domestic violence and children are involved. Call 1300 853 437 for the cost of a local call Monday to Friday 9am to 5pm. Or go to www.dadsindistress.asn.au.
Men's Rights Agency (Qld) - One of the agency’s aims is to provide aid to victims of domestic violence and encourage initiatives to reduce the incidence of domestic violence. Call (07) 3200 8769 Monday to Friday 9am to 5pm. Or go to their website at www.mensrights.com.au.
Start Safely - a subsidy to provide short to medium term financial help to eligible clients who have experienced domestic or family violence so they can secure private rental accommodation and do not have to return to the violent situation. More information at www.housing.nsw.gov.au/Help+with+Housing/Homelessness/Domestic+Violence+and+Homelessness.htm.
Parent Line (NSW) - Provides parenting support for families coping with domestic violence. Many fathers are struggling to care for children in the midst of domestic violence. Parent Line can help. Their 24/7 telephone counselling and support service for parents and carers offers professional, experienced parenting expertise for 0 to 18 year olds; strategies tailored to meet the needs of families affected by DV; and immediate access to support, 24 hours a day. Call 1300 1300 52 or go to www.parentline.org.au.
Family Space (Qld) - a small but dedicated team of people who have come together because of a shared recogntion that family and domestic violence can affect many different people, not just women, in all types of relationships including same sex relationships. They provide educational and therapeutic groups for men and women who are using abuse, violence and anger in their relationships and want to cease this behaviour. Their website is at fspace.com.au.
The Line campaign - is aimed at helping teenagers and young adults through a difficult time in their lives. The things they experience in relationships now can affect them long into adulthood, so it’s very important to help in every way we can and ensure they understand the importance of respectful relationships. www.theline.gov.au
1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732) - The National Sexual Assault, Family & Domestic Violence Counselling Line is for any Australian who has experienced, or is at risk of, family and domestic violence and/or sexual assault. It is free, confidential and available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Professionally qualified, specialist counsellors will provide counselling, information, advice and referrals to relevant local services. Unfortunately the helpline is likely to be both better informed about and more utilised by female victims, and there are very few services available for them to refer male victims on to. Call 1800 737 732 or online (internet) counselling is available atwww.1800respect.org.au/1800RESPECT-online.html.
The NSW Government's Crime Prevention Division has produced a useful resource for victims of domestic violence called Your Court, Your Safety. A guide to going to court and getting help with domestic violence.
Hunter Domestic Violence Support & Advisory Services Inc (Cessnock, NSW) - A 24/7 service to assist men who are or have been experiencing domestic violence. Call 02 4990 9609 or 0488 246 693 or email . Their brochure is available for download here. Or go to their website at www.dvs4men.com.
Think Twice! (Mittagong, NSW) - Relationship abuse prevention and recovery, counselling and programs for couples and individuals experiencing conflict and abuse in their relationships. Call Toni McLean & Associates on 0409 599 887 or go to their website at www.thinktwiceprogram.net.
Menstime at Anglicare WA - a program for men providing relationship counselling, support, referrals and relevant and practical groups for men. Their website is at anglicarewa.org.au.
Perth Counselling (WA) - Jonathan Kester provides counselling and psychotherapy for couples and individuals, including marriage and relationship counselling, conflict resolution, communication skills, anxiety and depression, anger and stress management, childhood trauma and abuse, boys’ and men’s wellbeing. perthcounselling.net.au.
Men Abused by Women in Intimate Relationships (Canada) - An excellent electronic resource published by Alberta Children’s Services, covering such issues as What is abuse, What you can do, and Where to get help. www.child.alberta.ca/home/documents/familyviolence/doc_opfvb_booklet_men_colour.pdf
For Men Affected by Domestic Violence (UK) - A very good resource from the Greater London Domestic Violence Project. Covers issues such as What is Domestic Violence, Are you being abused, Myth busting, What you can do, and Support information. www.menshealthaustralia.net/files/For_men_affected_by_DV.pdf
Amen (Ireland) - Provides a confidential helpline and support services for male victims of domestic abuse and their children. amen.ie
ManKind Initiative (UK) - a charity that provides a help-line service for male victims of domestic abuse or domestic violence. www.mankind.org.uk
The Families Without Fear Project (UK) - a Brent based charity, providing a programme of individual counselling and group work for men and women dealing with domestic abuse in the North West London area. They provide the Abuse Intervention Programme for individual and group support programmes for men and women who are being abusive or violent; the Survivors of Abuse Support Programme for women and men who are experiencing violence and abuse in an intimate relationship; and Research and Evaluation to develop effective new ways of tackling domestic abuse and share experience and expertise with others. www.familieswithoutfear.org.uk
The Dyn Project (Wales) - Raising awareness and providing support for male victims of domestic abuse. www.dynproject.co.uk
ESTEEM is a confidential support and advice service for men who experience domestic abuse in Cornwall (UK). esteemmen.co.uk
Family of Men Support Society (Canada) - Education, advocacy, lobbying, crisis line, referals for men in need, peer support. www.familyofmen.com. Tragically Earl Silverman who ran this service and website passed away on April 26th 2013. Fundraising has commenced to build the Earl Silverman Center for male victims of domestic abuse. Donations can be made here.
Male Abuse Awareness Website (USA) - a complete resource guide for male victims & survivors of abuse. www.help4guys.org
Domestic Abuse Helpline for Men and Women (USA) - Run and operated by unpaid volunteers who have devoted enormous amounts of time to ensuring that both male and female victims of domestic abuse get the help and respect they need to free themselves from violent relationships. dahmw.org
Stop Abuse For Everyone (USA) - A human rights organisation that provides services, publications and training to serve those who typically fall between the cracks of domestic violence services: straight men, GLBT victims, teens, and the elderly. They promote services for all victims and accountability for all perpetrators. Check out their website at safe4all.org or download their brochure Are you (or someone you care about) a male victim of intimate partner abuse?
A New Leaf (USA) - Operates two 24-hour emergency shelter and transitional housing program for male and female victims of domestic violence. Services include: a crisis hotline, safe housing, meals, case management, childcare, domestic violence counseling, substance abuse counseling, parenting education, and life-skills classes. turnanewleaf.org/dvservices.asp
Antelope Valley Domestic Violence Council (USA) - Their programs provide services to all victims of domestic violence regardless of gender, age, ethnicity, socio-economic status or sexual orientation. www.avdvc.org
West Jordan Community Resource Center (USA) - Offers case management and referral services to domestic violence victims and local families using coordination and community response across multiple disciplines. southvalleysanctuary.com/west-jordan-community-resource-center
Family Violence Treatment and Education Association (USA) - a group of independent educators, researchers and mental health professionals from varied backgrounds, all of whom are specialists in the field of family violence. They are joined in a common purpose, concerned about partner, parent and sibling abuse and their consequences. www.favtea.com
Stichting Wende (Netherlands) - Operates the first Government-sponsored domestic violence shelters for men in the world. www.stichtingwende.nl/en
Mann als Opfer (Switzerland, in German) - a website dedicated to men who are victims of domestic abuse. These are mostly affected men who have suffered domestic violence from their partner. www.mann-als-opfer.com
SEXUAL ASSAULT & ABUSE
LivingWell - A Queensland resource which offers a range of services specifically designed to assist men who have experienced childhood sexual abuse or sexual assault, their partners, friends and family and service providers. Call (07) 3435 4358 or 1300 114 397 or go to www.livingwell.org.au.
A comprehensive Australia-wide list of sexual assault services for men is available at www.livingwell.org.au/Counsellingandsupport/Australiawidesexualassaultservices.aspx.
Unhelpful myths about the sexual assault and rape of men - an excellent web resource addressing commonly accepted myths that can make it difficult for a man to publicly name an experience of sexual assault or rape. www.livingwell.org.au/Generalinformation/UnhelpfulMyths.aspx.
South Eastern Centre Against Sexual Assault (VIC) - Resources for male survivors of sexual assault, child abuse, sexual harrassment and family violence can be found at www.secasa.com.au/index.php/survivors/10.
When a Man is Raped - A useful booklet designed to aid in the understanding about the rape of men, what professional support services are available and what they do, and what might happen if the rapist is prosecuted. www1.health.nsw.gov.au/ecav/pdf/when_a_man_is_rape.pdf.
Who Can a Man Tell? - A useful booklet written primarily for adult men who were sexually assaulted as children. It also contains information which may be helpful for relatives and friends who wish to support these men as they confront painful childhood experiences and strive to overcome the influence the abuse has had on their lives. www1.health.nsw.gov.au/ecav/pdf/Who_Can.pdf.
1in6.org (USA) - their mission is to help men who have had unwanted or abusive sexual experiences in childhood live healthier, happier lives. This includes providing resources for people who care about them. www.1in6.org
Male Survivor (USA) - committed to preventing, healing, and eliminating all forms of sexual victimization of boys and men through support, treatment, research, education, advocacy, and activism. www.malesurvivor.org
Male Abuse Awareness Website (USA) - a complete resource guide for male victims & survivors of abuse. www.help4guys.org
Mankind (UK) - Since 2000, Mankind has been delivering specialist support services to men (18+) who have experienced childhood sexual abuse and/or adult sexual assault at any time in their lives. www.mankindcounselling.org.uk
Kids Helpline - National - 1800 55 1800 - www.kidshelp.com.au
Reporting Child Abuse and Neglect - contact details for all states and terrirtories:
NSW - 132 111 - www.community.nsw.gov.au
ACT - 1300 556 728 or 1300 556 729
NT - 1800 700 250 - www.childabuseprevention.com.au/reportabuse/nt.htm
QLD - 07 3235 9999 - www.communities.qld.gov.au/projectaxis/reporting.html
SA - 131 478 - www.childabuseprevention.com.au/reportabuse/sa.html
TAS - 1300 737639 - www.dhhs.tas.gov.au/health__and__wellbeing
VIC - 131 278 - www.dhs.vic.gov.au
WA - 08 9492 5444 (WA Police: Child Abuse Investigation Unit)
NAPCAN - The mission of NAPCAN (National Association for Prevention of Child Abuse and Neglect is to prevent child abuse and neglect and to ensure the safety and wellbeing of every Australian child. www.napcan.org.au.
Adults Surviving Child Abuse - ASCA is a national organisation which works to improve the lives of adult survivors of child abuse throughout Australia. Call 1300 657 380 for the cost of a local call or go to www.asca.org.au. State and territory numbers are as follows: NSW (02) 8920 3611, SA (08) 8388 5661, VIC (03) 9880 7070, QLD 0419 724 561, NT 0408 280 502.
Australian Childhood Foundation - Their website will help you understand more about child abuse and neglect. It will give you ideas about steps you can take to stop it. It will answer many of the questions that you have about the topic. It will also help you to know what to do if you are worried about the safety of a child, a family or are experiencing problems yourself. www.stopchildabuse.com.au
Parentline - Provides a telephone counselling service to parents and carers of children aged from birth to eighteen years. Check out their website at www.parentline.com.au. State and territory numbers are as follows: ACT (02) 6287 3833, NSW 1300 130 052, NT 1300 301 300, QLD 1300 301 300, SA 1300 301 300, TAS 1300 808 179, VIC 13 22 89, WA 1800 654 432.
Raising Children Network - The Australian parenting website raisingchildren.net.au
My Child - An initiative of the Australian Government. This site is about children, with the main focus being on early childhood learning and child care. www.mychild.gov.au
Elder Abuse prevention, advocacy and information telephone numbers for all states and territories:
ACT - Elder Abuse Prevention Information Line 02 6205 3535
NSW - Police Assistance Line 131 444 | Seniors Information Service 131 244
NT - NT Health Services - 08 8999 2809 | NT Police 131 444
QLD - Elder Abuse Prevention Unit 1300 651 192 or 07 3250 1955
SA - Aged Rights Advocacy Service - 08 8232 5377 (Adelaide) or 1800 700 600 (rural)
TAS - Department of Health and Human Services - 03 6233 8514
VIC - Seniors Rights Victoria - 1300 386 821 or www.seniorsrights.org.au
WA - Advocare Inc - 08 9479 7566 (Perth) or 1800 655 566 (rural)
Mental Health Carers Arafmi (WA) Inc - Has established a male carers group to support carers who are abused in their role of caring for mentally ill persons - often family members. Their website is arafmi.asn.au.
SERVICES FOR GAY MEN
Mensline Australia - Has put together a good tip sheet for gay men experiencing family violence, available at menslineaus.org.au/Family-violence-in-same-sex-relationships.html.
Gay and Lesbian Legal Advice Service (NSW) - The Inner City Legal Centre operates the Gay and Lesbian Legal Advice Service (GLAS) by appointment on Tuesday and Wednesday nights. To make an appointment call (02) 9332 1966 or freecall 1800 244 481. Their website is at www.iclc.org.au/iclc_service4.html.
Safe Relationships Project (NSW) - The Inner City Legal Centre also operates the Safe Relationships Project (SRP), which can help you with going to court and applying for an Apprehended Violence Order (AVO). The SRP can provide free domestic violence court assistance for people in same sex relationships, transgender and transsexual people and intersex people. To make an appointment call (02) 9332 1966 or freecall 1800 244 481. Check out their website at www.iclc.org.au/srp/.
ACON’s Lesbian and Gay Anti-Violence Project (NSW) - Runs a report line and information and referral service. Reports can be anonymous and are used to develop education resources, advocate on behalf of individuals and to map incidents of same sex domestic violence (in emergencies call the police). Call (02) 9206 2116 or freecall 1800 063 060 from 10am-6pm, Monday to Friday. Or go to their website at avp.acon.org.au.
LawAccess (NSW) - Provides free telephone legal information, advice, referral and assistance to people in NSW. Call 1300 888 529 for the cost of a local call. Plain language legal information resources can be accessed on their website at www.lawaccess.nsw.gov.au.
Protection orders are orders of the court that can help to stop violence and intimidation. They are not the same as a criminal charge, but it is a crimnal offence to disobey one. Anyone affected by domestic and family violence can ask the the police to apply to the Court on their behalf to obtain an order. Protection orders have different names in different states and Territories. Please click on your state below to find the details relevant to you: ACT: Domestic Violence Orders, NSW: Apprehended Domestic Violence Orders, QLD: Domestic Violence Protection Orders, NT: Domestic Violence Orders, SA: Intervention Orders, VIC: Family Violence Intervention Orders, WA: Violence Restraining Orders, TAS: Family Violence Orders.
MEN FROM NON-ENGLISH SPEAKING BACKGROUNDS
Translating and Interpreting Service (National) - The Department of Immigration and Citizenship (DIAC) provides this service for people who do not speak English and for the English speakers who need to communicate with them. TIS National is available 24 hours a day, seven days a week for any person or organisation in Australia requiring interpreting services. Call 131 450 24/7 or go to www.immi.gov.au/living-in-australia/help-with-english/help_with_translating
PROFESSIONAL DEVELOPMENT (For workers in the sector)
Working with Men affected by Violence Training Program - The issue of men affected by violence in intimate relationships has been reported for many years. Workers in the domestic violence (DV) and family relationship sector are acknowledging this problem and seeking out training for their workers. This training program has been developed and piloted by men’s health consultant Greg Millan, an educator, trainer and researcher with 17 years experience in the men's health area.
The training program is provided for health/welfare/community workers to provide information and strategies for working with men who are affected by violence in their relationships. It can be tailored to suit the needs of individual agencies and is normally delivered in a one day training package.
Training program includes:
- Background to the problem – what we need to do
- The affects of DV on a person – what’s different for men
- Strategies for working with men from a strengths-based perspective
- Counselling approaches that work for men
- Groupwork approaches to take with men
- Building services for male victims of DV into your agency – what you need to consider
- Promoting work for male victims of DV.
For more information on the Working with Men affected by Violence Training Program contact Greg Millan via the Men’s Health Services website at menshealthservices.com.au or phone 0417 772 390.
Breaking the Silence: A Practical Guide for Male Victims of Domestic Abuse - Dr. Elizabeth Celi
The Abuse of Men: Trauma Begets Trauma - Barbara Jo Brothers
Abused Men: The Hidden Side of Domestic Violence - Philip W. Cook
The Abusive Personality, Second Edition: Violence and Control in Intimate Relationships - Donald G. Dutton
Domestic Violence: The 12 Things You Aren't Supposed to Know - Thomas B. James
Rethinking Domestic Violence - Donald G. Dutton
Venus: The Dark Side - Roy Sheppard & Mary T Cleary
Truth and Prejudice: Men's Experiences of Domestic Violence - Edith Crawford
Women Who Perpetrate Relationship Violence: Moving Beyond Political Correctness - Fred Buttell & Michelle Mohr Carney
Older Men's Business: Valuing Relationships, Living with Change - Jack Zinn (while not specific advice/support for victims of family violence/abuse, this book may be a supportive text for building abused men's self awareness and self efficacy)
Victims No Longer: The Classic Guide for Men Recovering from Sexual Child Abuse - Mike Lew
The Courage to Heal - Ellen Bass & Laura Davis (while this book is written by women for women and does not specifically address men’s issues, it nevertheless is an excellent book about recovery)
The Courage to Heal Workbook - Laura Davis
Broken Boys, Mending Men: Recovery from Childhood Sexual Abuse - Stephen D. Grubman-Black
Abused Boys: The Neglected Victims Of Sexual Abuse - Mic Hunter
Wounded Boys, Heroic Men: A Man's Guide To Recovering From Child Abuse - Daniel J. Sonkin
The Invisible Wound: A New Approach to Healing Childhood Sexual Abuse - Wayne Kritsberg